As The New Year Enters, We Diet On Dreams.

It's about two days away.

I've been through it sixteen times. You would think it would be almost predictable to me by now. All over the world gleaming LED balls of crystal are dropped down to the ground, confetti is sprinkled across cities, and fireworks become the evening entertainment.

And yet every year, it completely bedazzles me. Perhaps it's because the fireworks look like a billion stars, and at that moment I am just completely lost in ecstasy.

And I count down the years I have left until I am legal (which I am still doing.)

But somehow, this New Year is going to mean something more to me than orgasmic stars in the sky and countdowns.

It is a year totally based on dreams.

There is one side : where I am able to leave the first part of my life here, and enter a new passage to the beginnning of the rest of my future. I am going to leave homebase and make a person out of me (finally, argh) and push myself to the extent of my potential - and most definitely make all my dreams a reality. Every single one of them :

Cashier, librarian, pilot, drummer, guitarist, singer, dancer, actress, model, photographer, fashion designer, banker, economist, lawyer, doctor, life -saver, path - changer, crowd - gatherer, show -stopper, tension - bearer, future - predicter, befriender, lover, mother, caretaker, nurturer, pain - bearer, emotion - controller ...

Gosh, that's alot of shoes to fill.

And then there is the other side : I could completely fail everything I am hoping for and have my glass dreams shatter into a billion pieces onto me. Which, being as pessimistic as I can be, may happen.

I am pushing myself to the boundaries. It seems like it's happened before, and then again. Maybe the time lapse of an entire year makes it seem like it hasn't. But this time, my entire future lies on this exam. No grade, no future.

While dealing with this enigma I have set upon myself, among other things such as the meaning of life, I have got to try my hardest and make the best of the time and brain matter left. All I have now is the opportunity to try my best with the good side of my dreams pushing me ahead. The outcome of all of this - is up to higher powers.

And that's how I'll ring in the New Year : Something powerful to destroy my anxieties, turn them into motivational instincts and help me sail to success on a bed of clouds.

Sounds like alcohol, don't you think?

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